Hotline Bling

Phoney baloney bastards,

A match made in hell,

Selling shit like Starbucks.

If I didn’t know, I couldn’t tell.

All bling-bling without a ting,

All ting-ting without warning.

Fuck you to damnation, you toad slime.

I’mma gonna curse you till it’s my time.

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Grill – Dumb Questions Answered

Once upon a time, I lived under a rock. When I decided to rock out, I was faced with a lot of unfamiliarity. I didn’t know things. So I made this list of questions that popped in my head and researched and found these simple answers:

 

What is Easy Listening? – When your ears have to do no work, the music seeps in the brain.

What is Continental Food? – Food derived from the continents.

What is Country Music? – Music from, get this, not countries, but pastoral settings.

What is Comfort Food? – Food that makes you fat, so in essence, DELICIOUS!

What is Sugar Rush? – Have a palmful or more of candies and wait.

What is Unfriend? – Facebook version of *blowing raspberries* at someone

What is Like? – Facebook version of paying attention to someone.

What is #metoo? – Me too was part of this altercation, man!

What is trending? – Everyone, except you, is talking about it.

Who owns the Internet? – Hmmm… Google? Amazon? Apple? I don’t know, I don’t.

What are cookies? – One kind can be eaten, others stay on your computer.

What is #hashtag? – ALT+35; symbol used to set something in motion on the internet.

What is Skrillex? – You’d be amazed, its a person!

What is Gender Fluid?– People, just being people.

What is Instagram, Spotify, Snapchat, Twitter, Facebook, Reddit, Pinterest, Tumblr, et al? – Any new made-up words you come across are an app, or a website or something to do with internet.

What is app? – An application, online application, like Candy Crush. Not the kind to apply for a loan or a grant. Although there are online application forms for loans and whatnot, but those are not called apps.

What are bots? – Laziness has taken over and “robots” are shortened to bots. A lot has been shortened. BRB, IMO, TTYL, YOLO, AFAIK, SOV, ROFL.. the list is looooong.

What are emoticons? –  :-),  ;-), :-(, :-B… they started like this and now there are emoticons for which there are no words.

Why these questions? – I really didn’t know! I Googled and got answers.

 

*** No offence to anyone. I’m just old. *grin face*